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Hi, I’m Shani

NPR once called me a humor essayist, let’s go with that.  

shanisilver@gmail.com

Podcast Episode: I Was So Unhappy Before Cancer

Podcast Episode: I Was So Unhappy Before Cancer

Jennifer Garam is amazing. I’ll start there. When I saw that this former colleague of mine had been diagnosed with stage 3 ovarian cancer I was scared, concerned, all manner of feelings—and as I followed along on social media as she shared this journey with her friends, I also knew I wanted to hear her story. She graciously agreed to tell it. On this episode she’ll share stories from her cancer fight as a single woman, her perspective on being single during it, and also we’ll discuss a very cute dog. I am so lucky to know Jen, and so in awe of and inspired by her. I have a feeling you will be, too. Listen on iTunes, Spotify, or below.

As a bonus, below is another story from Jen that once again highlights her strength and perspective, both of which I adore. xo

From Jen:

Recently I ran into a friend who'd gone on a couple of great dates with a guy and hadn't heard from him since, and she was wondering if she should text him and why he wasn't texting her and I was like, "Who cares? He's an asshole, that's why he hasn't texted you!"

I've wasted so much time in those conversations with friends and my therapist: "And I said this and then he said this and I then I texted this and he texted that and then I haven't heard from him for two weeks and what did I do wrong and why isn't he texting and should I text him?"

NO! This is just basic human decency and if a guy is going to ghost or slow-fade or act super interested and then totally disappear, leaving you upset and in a confused, painful twist of emotions about what happened, you don't have to nudge him with a text to help him out. He is at best clueless and inconsiderate and more likely unkind and unable to get out of his own STUFF long enough to consider someone else's feelings for TWO SECONDS, and not only should you not text him, and not waste anymore time beating yourself up for something you might have done wrong, you should RUN.

I don't want to waste another moment of my life in one of those "and then he said this and I texted that and now I haven't heard from him" conversations. I don't want to be the one saying that and I don't really have an interest in being on the receiving end listening to it, either.

We all have a lot more important things to do and better ways to use our time, and we should stop giving our power away to people who aren't considerate of our feelings, who we often barely know, and start doing those OTHER THINGS that bring us more joy, which is basically ANYTHING ELSE.

Photo Credit: Penelope Love / @penelopeloveshair

Podcast Episode: What's Wrong With You?

Podcast Episode: What's Wrong With You?

I Went To Wayla And The Internet Is Right

I Went To Wayla And The Internet Is Right

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