Hi, I’m Shani

NPR once called me a humor essayist, let’s go with that.

I Use $50 Conditioner — I Have My Reasons

I Use $50 Conditioner — I Have My Reasons

My hair is crap. Let’s start there. It curls when I want it straight, it’s straight when I want it to curl. My bangs literally recoil at a drop of humidity. My split ends breed like fruit flies. I'd sort of resigned myself to a lifetime of folicular mediocrity until one day, a package from Birchbox showed up (my coping skill is beauty products) and one of the samples was for Coco & Eve Like A Virgin.



At first blush. any product that uses bathing suited women touching butts in its packaging (see photo) will have limited access to my attention. However, I hadn’t been pleased with my current conditioner’s performance, so I figured what the hell. (To be fair, I also doubted any conditioner could withstand the month of May and its propensity to be meteorologically fickle.)

My friends, it is a new (hair) day. I have achieved smoothness typically reserved for fairy tales and river stones. I have endured humid and even — dare I say it — rainy days without so much as a frazzled baby hair. My own hair straightener has achieved feats beyond what she thought herself capable. What is even happening? In a lot of ways, I don’t recognize my own hair, but in just as many ways, I’m 100% fine with that.

When I first saw the price tag, I threw up in my heart a little. Fifty dollars? For conditioner? You’ve actually lost your damn mind. Then I started noticing how I hoarded the sample size, getting increasingly more nervous the closer it came to empty. With each use that passed, I realized the value of eternal good hair days. Take my money, Amazon — let’s dance this tango as we always do.


Who is this smooth bitch? I don’t know her.

This product is marketed as a “hair masque” but I use it as my daily conditioner. I don’t have time (or the willingness to stay in the shower that long) to leave it on for 10 minutes, but my 2-3 minute use generates results I like enough to blog about them. It’s vegan, not tested on animals, and safe on my extremely dyed hair because I’m scared of my own grays. I know this tub doesn’t look big, but it’s a ton of product considering I just need literally a blueberry sized amount per use.

If you are really, really tired of hating your hair even after you’ve put 30 minutes of work into it, and if nothing frightens you like checking the day’s humidity percentage, give yourself the gift of silky smoothness the likes of which you’ve never known. It’s a crazy dollar amount for conditioner, but after a lifetime of hair that’s always been meh, I like my money where I can brush it.

Coco & Eve Like A Virgin

I purchased my full-sized product, and I earn an affiliate commission from links in this post.

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